Many people seek to build stable relationships in order to stop feeling lonely. But this does not work in all cases. Sometimes, even being close to a loved one, you can feel loneliness no less than if you really were alone. This may seem strange to you - after all, you have someone to talk to, and there is something to do with your free time with a girl.
It is not always easy to realize on your own what exactly is the reason for your feeling of loneliness. It's one thing if you are not paid attention and you rarely see each other. It’s completely different when, it seems, everything is fine in your couple. We've rounded up a few non-obvious reasons that make you feel lonely.
1. Your wants and needs are ignored
The feeling of loneliness can arise not only due to the lack of physical interaction with a person. Some couples are quite comfortable living apart from each other and meeting a couple of times a week. Your emotional state depends not only on the amount of time you spend with your girlfriend. There are things that are much more important: for example, your ability to listen and hear, and if not share, then at least support the desires and needs of a loved one.
It is quite logical that from your loved ones you expect some kind of interest in how you are doing, what you live, what you dream about, and so on. Yes, your girlfriend should not satisfy your desires and needs, this task lies entirely with you. But at the same time, she can support your zeal, provide you with all possible assistance, and not devalue what is important to you. If you do not receive all this, you do not feel the interest of a loved one in you and your condition. As a result, there is a feeling of loneliness.
2. You don't support each other's interests
In a couple, no one should give up their favorite activities in order to share the interests of their partner. But you can always show a little attention to what a loved one is fond of. For example, ask a few questions to find out why he enjoys a certain activity, praise him for his success, or suggest that they try to do something together. Even a small display of interest in what a person considers important gives him the feeling that he is loved, appreciated and supported.
If your interests are persistently ignored, ridiculed or not paid any attention to your victories, you begin to feel lonely. And over time, loneliness only intensifies, and the girl’s behavior seems cold and distant to you.
3. You can't rely on a person
Of course, you can assume that in a relationship everything depends on you and you should take all the responsibility for the two of you on your shoulders. But this is not quite the right approach: after all, both partners in a pair are capable people who can take care of themselves on their own. The essence of the relationship is not that someone alone is responsible for himself and for his loved one. Relationships are a union, a partnership, and the desire to take care of each other should arise in two people.
It's great if you can ask your girlfriend for anything and be sure that she will help you. In this case, you will have an understanding that in a difficult situation you will combine your efforts and cope with all the trials. If you cannot hope for a loved one, you will not have confidence in the future, there will be no feeling that your relationship is equally valued by both of you.
4. You feel disconnected from the relationship
The reasons for the feeling of isolation from the relationship can be very different. For example, you devote too much time and energy to work, therefore, you are rarely at home, and in those very moments when you still succeed, the only thing you want is to relax. Maybe you are experiencing some kind of unpleasant news or a difficult situation and instead of speaking out to the girl, you decided to close yourself in. Or maybe the reason for feeling disconnected from the relationship is not at all in your behavior. Your girlfriend may also push you away in difficult moments of life or be too busy.
Be that as it may, you cannot leave everything as it is. In this case, the feeling of loneliness will only grow, and relationships will deteriorate. Ultimately, this will lead to separation. Remember: no matter what happens, you can always talk to each other and solve the problem. The sooner you do this, the more likely you are to save the relationship and make it stronger.
5. You suffer from low self-esteem
How you evaluate yourself, how you feel about yourself - greatly affects how you feel when you are in a relationship. If you have low self-esteem, you most likely suffer from a lack of attention, from the desire to constantly receive confirmation that you are really loved, you are jealous with or without reason, you strive to spend all your free time with a girl. Of course, if your partner has healthy self-esteem, this arrangement does not suit him at all. The girl is angry because of your mistrust, hypercontrol and obsession, and you feel lonely.
In addition, you can evaluate every action of a loved one from the position of “loves” and “does not love”. In moments when you do not receive attention or are faced with the coldness of a girl, you may experience fear that you will be abandoned. Her requests to give her a little more personal space can be too emotional for you. This further increases the feeling of loneliness.
Ijaz khan
매그너스9
Juliantes