At the first communication with girls on the VeronikaLove and at the beginning of a relationship, the feeling of falling in love overshadows all the shortcomings of your partner, preventing you from objectively assessing your future together and noticing warning signs. It is difficult to maintain clarity of thinking, which can lead to painful disappointments in the future. In order to avoid them, you need to pay attention to these few things.
1 The disadvantages that the girl talks about
If a girl tells you about her shortcomings at the first meetings, do not rush to convince her otherwise. In most cases, at such moments, a person really shares with you important information about himself. Most often, this behavior is typical of girls who have negative relationship experiences. They prefer to tell you everything bad right away, so that you immediately understand which of your expectations are realistic and which should be abandoned. When you hear a girl listing her shortcomings, it is important for you to try to be as honest as possible with yourself. No matter how strong your sympathy for a person, you need to decide whether you can come to terms with the described characteristics of character or behavior. Take the girl’s words seriously and don’t rush to conclusions.
2 Is the girl interested in you or only talking about herself? Ideally, if both people are interested in communication - they are ready not only to talk about themselves, but also to listen to the other. For some people, dating and even relationships are a way to get rid of boredom, show off, get attention, love and care. So analyze how you and your girlfriend behave when spending time together. If all she does is talk about herself, this is a one-way communication that is doomed to failure. If she is interested in who you are, what your values are, what your hobbies are and what you want from life, then the girl is really interested in your personality.
3 Is the girl open in communication?
Any healthy relationship cannot exist if there is no openness in it. You can communicate with a person as much as you like, but you will never find out what he really is. In the same way, you can form a complete image of your interlocutor in just a few meetings, provided that you are both ready to open up to each other. It is clear that at the very beginning of communication you will feel distance and some discomfort. You may not want to discuss certain topics that you feel are too personal, touch on painful past events, or show vulnerability. But if you decide to build a relationship, you must be willing to open up to each other.
4 Does the girl share your values?
You may have different interests, but common values will bind you, giving impetus to joint development. It is advisable, even before the start of a relationship, to understand how similar you and the girl are in your views on life, in the perception of early events and phenomena. If you don't have the same values as your girlfriend, your couple won't be able to move forward in the same direction. In this case, you will both feel resentful and disappointed, demand that your partner give up his priorities, and the relationship will ultimately come to an end.
5 What a girl wants from a relationship
If a girl immediately warned you that she was not ready for a serious relationship or did not want one, most likely she was. Even if you are dating now, it is very naive to believe that the girl has radically changed her position. To understand whether it is worth continuing a relationship, analysis and know what you expect from them. If you want a serious relationship, then honestly discuss your intentions and expectations with the girl and, if there is a discrepancy, decide to break up. It is better to break off communication at an early stage than to flatter yourself with hopes that the person will see you in a better light and realize what he may lose.
6 A girl’s emotional availability
It is important to pay attention to how the girl behaves. If she is not able to express her feelings, provide support in difficult moments, or rejoice in your successes, then this indicates emotional closeness. An emotionally closed person usually builds a wall between himself and the people around him to avoid emotional intimacy. A relationship with such a girl is doomed to failure: you will experience suffering and pain, trying to understand the reason for her coldness, feel guilty and torment yourself with anxious thoughts.