Breaking up is a difficult period in life that probably everyone has encountered. For some, the breakup of a relationship with a loved one is relatively calm, while others experience unbearable suffering. It all depends on many factors: personal experience, the duration of the relationship and emotional closeness in it, the reason for the separation, how the decisive conversation went, and so on. However, despite all the difficulties, it is possible to survive this difficult event. Moreover, you can make this process easier and faster if you give up some actions.
You withdraw into yourself
In moments when you feel very bad, your family and close friends should be nearby. The support they provide will help you get rid of the feeling of loneliness, cope with your emotions faster and move on.
You shouldn’t withdraw into yourself, try to appear strong to everyone around you, or reject offers of help. If your loved ones invite you to spend time together, offer to come and listen, find reasons to please you and push you to safely express emotions, these people need to be valued. You feel that you would do the same for them - do not reject their desire to take care of you.
You are looking for the reasons for what happened in yourself
If you have a very developed sense of guilt and you are always used to taking responsibility for everything, this can make your life very difficult. For example, after a breakup, you will begin to analyze all your words and actions, look for the reasons for what happened in them. But, if you have experienced the betrayal of a loved one, there is no need to try to understand which of your words and actions could push the girl to these actions. Each person makes decisions based on his own moral and ethical considerations, on his own value system.
You follow a girl's life
It’s a huge mistake to continue following a girl’s life after a breakup. Especially if you broke off the relationship not on your initiative or because of betrayal on her part. The advice to immediately remove each other from social networks and completely stop communicating really works - it becomes easier for you to survive all your negative emotions. Instead of watching how your still loved one builds his life without you, rejoices, starts a relationship, and so on, you concentrate on yourself.
If someone convinces you that cutting off all communication with a girl is stupid and childish, you can safely send such advisers. No one but yourself knows what to do correctly in a given situation. Focus on your own feelings, not on the opinions of others. Just because someone can continue to communicate with their ex or even maintain friendly relations with them, this does not mean that everyone else should do so. Still, each of us has our own unique life experience, and everyone’s breakup stories are also different.
You hope that you can make things right
As a rule, if a couple decides to separate, then all attempts to fix their relationship have already failed. If both people agree to break up, it means their priorities have shifted and they no longer see the point in working towards a common future. Therefore, it is better not to hope that something will change dramatically and you will be together again. Of course, this can happen, but only if both you and your ex-girlfriend analyze the relationship, take into account your mistakes and come to the conclusion that you were hasty in your decision. However, if the reason for the separation was betrayal, it is extremely undesirable to think about second chances. At the very least, you must understand that a person who decides to betray your trust once may well repeat his act.
You are learning the role of the victim
After a breakup, you may be plunged into the feeling that you were treated dishonestly and incorrectly. If you don’t try to draw some conclusions from what happened, try to cope with your emotions and return to the usual rhythm of life, most likely you will find yourself in the position of a victim. You will begin to show sympathy, constantly discuss the same things, for example, the reasons for your breakup, throw out a bunch of negativity towards your ex and deliberately embellish some events. Instead, you should focus on self-development and growth, try to regain control of your life, avoiding complaining and whining as much as possible.
Ijaz khan
매그너스9
Juliantes