How to deal with nervousness on a first date

A first date is both exciting and scary. No matter how beautiful, smart, successful or interesting you are, you cannot avoid the excitement before meeting the girl you like. However, you can reduce the severity of your worries if you follow these tips.

Don’t set yourself the goal of getting a girl to like you from the first meeting
If your first date is coming soon, then most likely you already like each other. Otherwise, no one would have scheduled the meeting. So don’t set yourself the goal of getting a girl to like you. At the very least, she definitely won’t be able to fall in love with you in one or two dates. It is simply unrealistic to get to know each other so quickly; it will take much more time to establish trust and study.

When you go into a meeting with the goal of impressing, you take on too much responsibility. First dates are an opportunity to get to know someone and have a good time together. Let this be your new goal.

Find out what she is interested in
You can and should prepare for a date in advance: at least find out what the girl is interested in. This will give you the opportunity to think about topics that are worth discussing and that you both will enjoy. Also, knowing the girl’s preferences will help you organize a meeting format that will allow you two to feel comfortable. Don’t be afraid to show your curiosity even before the first date: ask questions about what she is interested in, what music she listens to, how she spends her free time, where she prefers to go, and so on.

Be yourself
If you have a date, it means that you have already managed to interest the girl in something. Don't try to pretend to be someone else, demonstrate character traits that you do not possess, embellish stories about yourself, and so on. In the best case, your deception will still be revealed, in the worst case, you will be able to build a relationship, but at the same time you will both feel unhappy in it.

You have only one option to find the very girl who suits you. Be yourself, be open, speak directly about your interests, desires, needs, goals and values. This way you can cut out those who are not suitable for you and attract the girl who will share your views and plans for the future.

Don't think about the future
You go on your first dates with a girl just to get a rough idea of what kind of person she is, what her dreams, goals, and values are. It's too early to think about what you might do in the future. It is likely that you will be disappointed in each other, will not get along in character, or will simply come to the conclusion that you want different things from the relationship.

Don't get too far ahead: be here and now. Try to enjoy the moment, talk, ask more questions, build mutual understanding with the girl. And don't give in to negative thoughts about the future.

Talk about your feelings and emotions
If you are worried and afraid that your anxiety will ruin the date, then voice it. Yes, it’s paradoxical, but this method works best. Trying to hide your emotions and give the impression that you are calm and relaxed, you get the exact opposite effect.

It's a completely different matter if you directly tell a girl that you are worried, shy or afraid of something. Firstly, such honesty is incredibly captivating. Secondly, this recognition reduces the degree of tension - the girl probably feels awkward herself. After your revelation, she will also be able to talk about her experiences, and the situation will automatically become more comfortable. You will not need to pretend to be someone else, hide behind a mask, or be afraid of your emotions.