You can be a successful, smart, charismatic and outwardly attractive guy, but this will in no way help you build relationships. More precisely, you can meet someone, but quickly part, not understanding what is the true reason for the breakup. In fact, creating a strong and lasting relationship is not as difficult as it might seem at first glance. It is enough to understand what exactly does not allow your relationship to develop, and work out this problem. Of course, there is no universal answer to the question of why your relationship ends quickly. But there are a number of mistakes that you can make without even thinking about the negative consequences. We've rounded up a few reasons why you don't have a long-term romantic relationship.
1. You hush up your dissatisfaction.
When a situation arises in a relationship that causes you negative feelings - irritation, resentment, anger, and so on, it is important to immediately discuss this with the girl. Of course, there is little pleasant in such conversations, but they are necessary in order for the problem to be solved. You may be afraid of conflicts or worry that you may not be heard or misunderstood, and therefore choose a strategy of silence. But, contrary to your expectations, over time the situation will not change for the better, but will only begin to worsen, and eventually parting awaits you.
Learn to talk about what makes you uncomfortable, rather than ignore your feelings or postpone discussing the problem until later. Do not make claims with aggression, blaming the girl for anything. Just draw her attention to the fact that a certain act of hers or words spoken to you make you feel bad. It is your assessment of the situation or the very behavior of a person that causes a negative emotional reaction in him.
2. You try to show only your best features.
When people get to know each other in order to make the right impression and interest a person, the strategy is often chosen to show only your best qualities, trying to hide something that might alienate a potential partner. But this plays a cruel joke: the girl does not fall in love with you, but with the image that you created for her requests. As a result, you are also in an anxious and upset state, not being able to be yourself, and she gradually begins to be disappointed that your promises and her expectations are not justified. As a result, you break up as soon as you forget and stop controlling your every step all the time.
It is very bad if you recognize yourself in this description. You do not give a person the opportunity to find out who you really are, what can bind you, you literally deceive the one you like for your own benefit - to increase the chances of a relationship. Be yourself - only in this case you will have the opportunity to find a girl who will love you and accept all your shortcomings.
3. You find it difficult to express your emotions and desires.
In a healthy and harmonious relationship, both partners freely talk about what makes them happy and share their emotions with each other. If for some reason you find it difficult to open up to a girl, it is not surprising that your relationship ends quickly. First, you yourself are not satisfied with your interaction. Most likely, it seems to you that they do not hear you, do not love, do not respect and do not understand. Although an unsuspecting girl is happy to meet you halfway, do something nice or support in a difficult moment, because you are used to keeping silent.
Secondly, it may seem to your girlfriend that you are an emotionally closed person, uninterested in your relationship. It will be extremely difficult to build interaction with you. Learn to talk about what's important to you and be more open about expressing your emotions.
4. You are not ready to put up with other people's shortcomings.
You can dream about how you will meet “the one” - the perfect girl who will meet all your desired criteria. But here's the catch: people generally rarely live up to other people's expectations, and they shouldn't do it, just like you yourself. It is foolish to expect that one day the picture that captured your imagination will come to life and meet you in real life.
In reality, you still have to put up with the various imperfections of the person you have feelings for. However, your girlfriend will also have to get used to one or another of your shortcomings, so you will be in the calculation. Seriously, perfect people don't exist. Try to understand as quickly as possible whether you can turn a blind eye to certain features of behavior or worldview, or whether you categorically disagree with something, and you should immediately end the conversation with the girl.
5. You listen to other people's advice.
Parents, relatives, friends, colleagues - all these people in one way or another turn out to be stakeholders when it comes to your relationship. There is nothing wrong with this if you know how to draw their attention in time to the fact that they violate your personal boundaries, and if you do not take their every advice as a guide to action. Whatever one may say, the relationship is yours - you live with the chosen person, build a future with him and evaluate what is normal for you and what is not.
Stop listening to other people's advice - they only prevent you from thinking with your own head. Nobody knows what you need better than you. Other people may have very different life experiences from yours, completely different views on relationships, a different character, goals and priorities. Do not let other people's biased judgments ruin your personal life.
6. You don't understand why you need a relationship.
Maybe you are looking for a relationship without understanding why you need it. You join them simply because everyone has girlfriends or relatives think it's time for you to settle down or for any other reason that does not correspond to your motivation and your goals in life. Relationships built in this way are doomed to break after some time. All hopes for a happy future are shattered by a misunderstanding of what you are generally striving for. First, decide what you need, and only then decide whether to start dating a girl or not. So you save a lot of time, effort and other resources.
Ijaz khan
매그너스9
Juliantes