Why do we fall in love with stars and even fictional characters.

We can empathize with people on the other side of the screen in the same way as real friends and family.

What is a parasocial relationship.

Parasocial refers to a special type of unequal relationship in which there is a feeling of connection with figures from films, books and the media - famous people or characters. In this case, only viewers, listeners or readers are active participants in such relations.
Eagerly waiting for a new episode of your favorite sitcom, watching your favorite movie, following YouTube vlogs, reposting entries on Twitter without a response to the author, hair like your favorite singer - these are just some examples of parasocial relationships.

For the first time they started talking about back in the 50s of the last century. Then the American scientists Donald Horton and Richard Wall introduced the term "parasocial ties" into scientific circulation. It denoted the attachment of the public to media people discovered by the researchers, as well as a sense of belonging with them.

The objects of parasocial relations can be not only actors, musicians and TV presenters. Often people have feelings for fictional characters. Although the differences between the image created by a public person and the hero of a work of art are so great is a big question.

What are the consequences of parasocial relationships?

On the one hand, parasocial relationships create a false sense of intimacy. Such "communication", at least outwardly, is very similar to the real one, because many formal signs of live communication are observed. We listen to the stories of the parasocial "interlocutor", we follow his voice, gestures and emotions, we perceive his advice.

This can lead to different consequences. We discuss the personal life of a public person and his actions as if we live in the same family, we see in him our friend or enemy, lover or object of worship. But in fact, all these are just phantoms and illusions that exist only in our head.

The situation can be aggravated when a person experiences problems with live communication. Parasocial relationships are seductive because they give a sense of control: they arise at the request of the viewer and stop in the same way. This is not possible with real people.

What to do if you are in a parasocial relationship.

Probably, the emergence of parasocial relations is associated with a decrease in social contacts in modern society. This lack of communication people try to compensate in different ways. And the easiest way to do this is without looking up from the screen.

When you find yourself prone to parasocial relationships, the first thing to ask yourself is: what do you need them for? Perhaps they simply make up for the lack of communication, create a feeling of friendship, friendship. In this case, there is nothing wrong with them, as long as they do not turn into a manic obsession.

The same YouTube video can teach something useful or just cheer you up. What's more, parasocial relationships can mitigate some of the negative effects of lack of communication and lack of attachment—which is good for mental and physical health.

But one must understand that parasocial relationships can eventually crowd out real ones, or even form false ones, as in the examples with Björk and Sandra Bullock. It can also cause feelings of worthlessness and self-doubt.

If you feel that parasocial relationships have begun to take an excessively long time, you are absorbed by an idol and you no longer have enough of such mediated "communication", it may be worth going to a psychologist or psychotherapist.